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Thanks To Paranormal Activity 3, That Time I Wrote A Blog While Terrified.

** My internet was down last night so I could not post this until tonight. Most of what I put in parentheses should help clarify. Or not.

I’m petrified. Why? I saw Paranormal Activity 3 tonight (last night), walked from my car in the pitch black of nightness and then into a pitch black house. If that wasn’t enough to freak the hell out of me, while I was taking my shoes off the lights inside my car came on. Not my headlights, but just the inside. Using my fob, that is impossible. In fact the only way to turn my inside lights on is to turn a little stick dial or push buttons. I don’t know how it happened. I don’t want to know. But I do know I’m never sleeping again or going outside (kind of a lie since I went to the state fair today. And out to lunch. And to a movie. And to the mall.) So, I’m writing a blog in hopes of taking my mind off of terror. It’s 1am and my dog keeps scaring me by making tiny noises so this is proving to be difficult.

I wish I could watch an episode of Arrested Development. For some reason I am dead set that that will solve my issues. However, the internet is down (probably due to Toby – the demon is PA3. *sob*) and I’m never going to be happy again. I would go to the internet box, technically speaking, and fix it but I am too frightened to go downstairs. In fact, I am too frightened to go to the bathroom and wash my face and it is the next room over.

If the sentence, “Wow, this movie really scared you.” You’re right. It really scared me. PA3 was terrifying for everyone in the audience. We all bonded because we all had envisioned the worst thing imaginable together. There was a black guy sitting behind me who commented the whole time with, “AHHH HELLLL NAHH” or, my fave, “What are you doing tomorra? Why ain’t you speaking?!”

Now that I really think about it, Para Act 3 was not the scariest movie out of all of them. I think Para Act 2 was the worst. Although this movie had its moments. Due to the fact I’m never sleeping again (Fact: I did sleep for two hours that night. Two hours of nightmares. Jamie Lee Curtis kept trying to break into my house to murder my brother’s dog. It was suspenseful.). Movies where I can’t see the object of scariness are the worst for me. You can’t see what you’re scared of; therefore, the mystery  and anticipation are much higher. But I will say the worst of all are alien movies. I’d rather gouge my eyes out with spoons. Multiple spoons. I’m not doing a good job distracting myself, am I?

I found all of my winter clothes today. I forgot about most of my shirts. Isn’t that the best feeling? It’s like someone went shopping for you but picked out everything you like and you didn’t have to go or try stuff on. There’s nothing I hate more than trying on clothes. Well, maybe Paranormal Activity 3. No. Stop. I’m wearing a penguin onesie. It’s so cold in my room that I had a fleece onsie on and am under a down comforter. It’s awesome.

I’m going to try to go to sleep. My dog is making it look so appealing. Besides, I put my tubs of winter clothes in front of my door, so what’s the worst thing that can happen? Toby coming to marry me? Got it…

See you in Heaven if I get murdered,


p.s. sorry for ruining the plot of the trilogy. SPOILER ALERT! Oh well. I’m dead now anyways so you can’t really be mad.


Yves Saint Laurent

I have been absolutely obsessing about these shoes. That’s all I have to say about that.


The Return… of Certain Dri

If I am good at one thing, it is getting cold sores and not blogging.

I am starting a new blog in hopes of documenting mediocre and major events in my life pre-dating my extraordinary photography career. Cough. If all goes as how I hope, this blog will be random, full of pictures, and entertaining. Because Mom, I want you to be entertained!

I’ll tell you some things you may not know about me. Or do. Shut up.

  • I use Certain Dri because my pits sweat a lot. I like to think of sweating as a symbole of my work ethic instead of being gross. I have found it is hard to think like that.
  • I heart the internet. No, it is a sickness. I can literally spend all day on amazing websites, not including facebook or twitters. But I love the twitters. If you want sites to procrastinate on, let me know. I’ll give you a list.
  • I have boxes and boxes of books lining my parents’ basement. Poetry, Young Adult, Non-Fic, Fic. Love it all and will read it all.
  • I wrote an awesome parody to “Baby Come Back” called “Jack-In-The-Box” and it is about getting food poisoning my first time there. Sadly, it will never see the light of the internet because I don’t want to have gotten sick AND sued by them. I hate laws and stuff.
  • I carry a rouge Chanel lipstick with me everywhere I go. Tip: Don’t carry lipstick with you everywhere you go.. they melt.
  • I have an awesome group of followers on Twitter, most of which are my mom. Hi Mom!
  • Summer is the worst. There is no hockey.
  • I am huge gamer. First person shooters are my fave. I melee zombies like a boss.
  • I have a genuine phobia of lobsters. I have killed a hornet with my bare hand and helped rehabilitate hysterical/abused horses, but seeing a lobster physically makes me want to pass the freak out.
  • If you don’t know what Pinterest is, check ya self.
  • I have had a recurring dream of Purgatory for five years. It happens a few times each month.
  • I have rheumatoid arthritis in every joint in my body.
  • My dad has one blue eye and one green eye. I have his green eye.
  • I have a firm belief, and I will stand by this, that there is not much else in this world funnier than kpop (korean pop).
  • I love owls.
Follow my blog! Or don’t. Shut up.
That’s all I have to say about that.